Snap shot Sunday

My precious little William. This was a few weeks before he turned one last February. This is one of the few shots you will see of him on here...I just have a thing about putting my kid's pictures out for public viewing. Too many horror stories out there! But there he is...an absolute angel...until he wakes up! Then he's a holy terror. Ha!
William surprised me with breakfast, a card and my presents in bed this morning. I got two wall sconces, two votive holders, 4 candles (one for each of course) and little framed painting. This will all go in my bathroom where the garden tub is at...to create my "relaxation oasis". I'm gonna need it with two little boys! And William was so precious this morning...running in at top speed shouting "happy mudder's day mommy". Just melts your heart. Sigh. I love being a mommy!
Happy "mudder's" day to all of ya'll too! :)

Is it just me loosing my mind?

I have my very own bedtime ritual every night. I brush my teeth, pee, take my prenatal vitamin, pee again (hey...I am pregnant), jump under the covers, take my hubby's hand and we pray together. The minute the lights go out, my body pops into the upright position....DID I take my vitamin. I inevitabley have to get back out of bed and look. This happens every night now. I'm hoping it's just a pregnancy/so much on my mind type thing...but I'm not counting on it.
At my "normal" OB appointment this morning (glucose test...blech!) my doctor asked me for an update on all the stuff going on with my perinatal doctor. He asked how many taps they had done since the last shunt placement. I blanked! I sat there...just staring. He smiled...I think he saw smoke was coming out of my ears. I finally flung my shirt up and counted "holes" and was able to tell him three.
Sometimes I even find myself heading down the hallway only to stop in midstep...what was I doing? Was I going to get a book or relieve my bladder? My bladder ALWAYS needs relieving so that's a pretty good bet...but was there something more?? I end up having to back track to wherever I was in the house (the couch as it has been most recently) and I retrace my thoughts. That usually helps, but sometimes...whatever it was just leaves me!
I call my husband my son's name and my son the dog's name. I have to re-read a paragraph twice (or more) sometimes when I'm relaxing with a book, sheerly because I wasn't really paying attention. I will call only to say "I'll call you back...I have NO idea what I wanted to talk about".
BUT...I can recite the theme song to all of the Disney cartoons my son watches. I can recall William's birth from water break to the toe curling first session of breastfeeding. I can even tell you names and jersey numbers of Georgia Tech's 1990 National Championship team! So I do have a brain...it's just taking a LOT of vacations at the moment! :)

Thursday 13 #5 Seeing Red

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Thirteen Things about the color red. I was reading the Atlanta Journal and Constitution (AJC) last night while unwinding from my stressful and tiring day of sitting (dripping sarcasm as I type), when I read that the college polling system was already publishing rankings for this year. Being an avid Georgia Tech fan, I always have I hopes of a high placement. Since it is a rebuilding year for us (new coaching staff)...I wasn't expecting it. But I also wasn't expecting who they were predicting to go number one in the nation...UGA *cough...over-rated...cough* . Anyway, in showing my good sportsmanship, I decided to list 13 items that are red that I do like every day of the year. And of course, Go Jackets! Sting those puppies! 1. cherries - they are so pretty to me. I love outfits with cherries on the...so summery. 2. ladybugs - afterall, it is said that if a lady bug lands on you, you will have good luck. 3. red strappy sandals - I prefer sandals to pumps, especially in the summer, and there is just something about them that make me feel sexy. :) 4. red nail polish- but I only like it on my toes...it requires too much maintenance on your fingers. 5. red meat- though I'm more partial to it when it is brown and fully cooked, but nothing hits the spot like a great big burger sometimes. 6. Tulips- my favorite flower. Most people prefer their roses to be red, but actually I like the peaches and yellows best for roses. 7. Fire truck- you never appreciate them until you've called them to come to your house, but everytime I see them on the road...I say a quick prayer for their safety. 8. Christmas paper- I'm much more of a "green girl", but I love how red and green compliment each other so perfectly for gift wrap. 9. Cardinals- not the baseball team (remember I'm into college sports) but the bird. Cardinals are such a striking sight of beauty against a grey/stark winter backdrop. 10. jelly beans - the red are my favorite! 11. oxygenated blood - weird maybe, but I find the color of blood to be a beautiful hue actually. Not the blue or purple blood (depending on if it has been to your lungs or not already) that is in your body, but the pin prick induced drop of blood on your finger. It hurts (literally) to look at it sometimes though. ;) 12. Holly berries- one of the reasons I had a winter wedding. I wanted Holly in my wedding bouquet. 13. red sunsets- ok...it's not a true red, but it's a vision to behold.

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One for the momma's out there!

Oh, we've all had one of THOSE days haven't we? When your child is up all night with a stuffy nose, TOO tired to nap (I still don't get that!), just all sorts of whiney and cranky, hubby comes home late from work and the pet of your choice just threw up on the couch or carpet...whichever stains easier! Luckily those days only come around twice a year around here, but they seem to last an eternity! I know I'm pushing my luck with this, but we haven't had any bad days yet this year...at least not with the one that is already out. I think God knows we have our hands full with the one that is still baking and has decided to cut us some slack. :)

But I've been thinking...all mother's go through days like this. Our mothers did, their mothers did...all the way back to the Bible even. And one mother's mountain is another's molehill and vice versa. Different things set each other off. Some women are anxiously charting temps and counting days in hopes that THIS time they will get that big fat positive line they have been hoping for. Others are dealing with tough choices when a big fat positive comes up unexpectedly. But all of us are dealing with something out there. All of us have our own trials to face.

Imagine the heartbreak Jochebed (not sure if I'm spelling that right) felt when she was told that Pharoah ordered all newborn sons to be thrown into the Nile. But her trust in God saved her little son, Moses, and he was able to carry out his purpose and free God's people. Sarah had to endure the tragedy of infertility (no clomid back then guys). But through her constant faith in the Lord, she was rewarded with Issac. Her trial showed her nothing was impossible if you kept your faith. And just try to imagine the great responsibility Mary felt when she gave birth to the salvation of men. The daily fear and worry she must have endured knowing what He had to do in His life.

Most moms feel they don't do enough for their children and yes, we can always do more...but dont' overlook what you do do for them. God doesn't. He sees it all and rewards you for it. Everytime you cut the crust off that PB&J sandwhich or take them to the dentist (kicking and screaming) it means more than you or your children realize. You don't have to be SuperMom, with the boots and cape. You just need an extra Kleenex and a juice box in hand, and a heart full of gratitude to God.

I can't help it...

Really...it's not my fault. (man, flash back to Harrison Ford in Star Wars - I've watched those movies WAY too much!) Every day, even when I'm not pregnant, I have a salad. It is just my food of choice. A large salad for lunch with meat and all the "fixins" like cheese, bell pepper, onions, carrots, almond silvers...really...I could keep going. Or just a small side salad either paired with a meal or as a snack. I NEED my daily salad. Most days, I even have two, because I think they are just that good.
We ran out of salad on Saturday night. Since we were heading to the zoo the following afternoon, I knew I'd be able to get one there for a light dinner, and I did! So Monday, yesterday, rolls around and we don't have salad in the house. No biggie though. We are off to the doctor for a fluid tap, and I don't like lunch on my stomach since the pressure is intense when they draw out the fluid. I usually eat a big breakfast and just snack or peanut crackers or a poptart in the car going down. But once we got back...I wanted a salad! Of course I'm not allowed to drive...I'm technically not allowed to even sit at more than a 30 degree angle for the first 24 hours...so I have to rely on my husband.
He is a great guy that does SO much for me especially since I'm the wife that should be doing for him! But being the mom, I always put myself last in the family (I think that is something all mothers are guilty of). When we cook dinner and realize that there is just not enough pasta to give everyone a full serving, it's our serving that we cut back on. If our child is showing the tell-tell signs of sickness, but we already have lunch plans...we cancel them to take care of them instead of getting out of the house. Those simple things and such. Well, Ian was going to run up to the store and grab me some salad, but it was time to feed William dinner. I wasn't able to sit at the table and feed him, so Ian had to do it. I told him to take care of our son first and not worry about me.
Well, once you feed him, walk the dog, get William in the bath, brush hair, brush teeth, nuggle, and hide dinosaurs (don't ask...it's just a tradition at our house)...it's pretty late. I want Ian to sit down and rest before he heads out to get me stuff. Then we make our routine calls to everyone to tell them about the appointment and how little Matthew is doing. It is now almost 10pm. I tell him don't worry about it. I don't want him going out and bothering with it now. I probably won't eat one this late anyway...especially since he was going to get milk, cranberry juice and toilet paper too since we are running low on all of those. It would be 10:30 -11pm before he even made it home. (Why are hubbies so much SLOWER at the grocery store by the way?)
Well, Ian decided he wanted to hit up Wendy's for a frosty and guess what...he brought me a side salad. And it was GOOD!

Snapshot Saturday

Elizabeth was kind enough to lend me this idea of posting snapshots of my life (past and present) on Saturdays or Sundays while little man is napping. Since tomorrow we will be getting ready for our big trip to Zoo Atlanta (I'm about to pee in my pants from the excitement!!) I figured I'd post these today.
These three pictures were taken back in late Decemeber 2005. I was nearly 8 months pregnant with my first son. Me, my hubby,my mother, my then 10 year old niece and my then 8 year old nephew all traveled the hour and a half length drive to Pine Mountain GA. A quaint little town located in the southwest corner of Georgia in between the cities of LaGrange and Columbus (I was born in Columbus - we're a family of army brats). But the reason to visit the small southern town, besides the friendly folks of course, is Callaway Gardens. http://www.callawaygardens.com/ Take a look at the link if you have time today or tomorrow. It has SO much to offer! We try to make it down there at least twice a year. Once in the Spring/Summer and again around Christmas. We go when the weather is nice so we can rent bikes, walk trails and lounge at Robin Lake with icecream. But we go back in the winter for Fantasy in Lights! It's breath-taking!
Without further ado...here are the snapshots of my trip to Callaway that year.



Ian and I at the horticulture center. They decorate this up for every season...but my favorites decorations are the all dried flowers Christmas tree and the all Poinsettia Christmas tree (which we are standing by). Both are about 20 ft tall and beautiful. Plus they have holly, roses, amaryllis and paperwhites in full bloom.



One of our most favorite places to visit at Callaway is the butterfly house. They have 100's of species through out the world flying free when you enter the glass doors. Wear red or purple and many will land directly on you! I have one picture of Ian when a butterfly landed on his mouth and started to feed from the moisture on them. Talk about butterfly kisses! I'll have to find that photo!! They also have glass "houses" were butterflies are emerging from cocoons. You can see them slowly break through the barrier and stretch out their wings to warm them. Then they fly out through the top once they are dry and hungry. As you can see...it looks like some new catepillars are on their way. I guess we should go ahead and give them a little privacy... ;)



And after a full day at all the different sights (and southern restaurants!) it is time for Fantasy in Lights!! A drive thru holiday light experience, and when I say drive thru...I really mean it! Lighted scenes are not just surrounding the sides of your car...they are over your car too! Ian and I always have to pop our heads out of the window to really get the full immersion experience. I feel like a kid everytime I'm there. Callaway even coordinates appropriate Christmas music with each scene too. It's wonderful. My favorites scenes...there are many to choose from...include Christmas Garden (the entrance is pictured above), Snowflake Valley, Firefly Cove and of course the Nativity scene that is set up on Robin Lake. You overlook it from the beach, with the water throwing the reflections back at you to make it seem even more magical and grand. Always brings tears to my eyes...

Well, that wraps up this weekends snapshots. Hope you enjoyed your look into a day at Callaway through my eyes.

Spreading the word

For the first time in my life, I've learned in a difficult way that I really have no control whatsoever over my life and the lives of those I love. It was a false security that I had (my anal scientist/eductor background I guess) that I actually could control or manipulate things to do what I wanted them to do. Not in a bad way of course...I wasn't practicing voo-doo on a guy I had a crush on and he didn't like me back or anything! Just a sense of control...especially since I had never really been tested and when I had...I always received whatever I asked for, it just took a bit longer to get them.
Now I am learning to Let Go and Let God. I let God decide if my child should be given the chance to live. I am letting God decide when my needs for attentive care stop overriding our family's needs of a working husband. And luckily, God has been so good and has given us everything we could ask for in life...just with a few obstacles.
But I'm also learning that my experiences might benefit someone else that is going through all of this. Here I am, a healthy 28 year old (at least for three more months) in the prime of life, taking vitamins, and going to the doctor and my son is diagnosised with a birth defect. His defect is called Lower Urinary Tract Obstruction (LUTO) and is 77% fatal BEFORE birth even and only about 18% of those that make it to birth can have full functioning lives ahead of them. I know the road will be long with many doctor visits and surgeries ahead, but I'm so thankful to have made it to 26 weeks and 4 days. Never thought I'd go this far 10 weeks ago when I first heard that awful diagnosis and was told to terminate my precious baby then and there. I'm glad I didn't listen fully to them, but opened up my heart to God's diagnosis.
Here's the links that I have found to be extremely helpful to me. Hopefully if you find yourself in this terrible situation one day or know someone that is already there...please tell them there is hope. Let Go and Let God carrying you down the path that He is showing you. It might not be the path you would chose, but for the first time giving up control...never felt so GOOD!

http://www.ourbaby.org/diagnoses/luto.htm

http://www.benotafraid.net/

http://www.fetalhope.org/fetal-issues.html

Thursday 13 #4 Disney Rides

Thirteen Things about Disney rides I love! There are more than 13 rides I love at Disney World and more than 13 places to eat, more than 13 shows, more than 13 characters...are you picking up on a pattern here? Here's the short list for rides. 1. Cinderella's Carousel. I always name my horse too. Just makes me feel free of all worries. 2. Space Mountain. My first "scary" ride as a little one, and I was hooked. I loved that the lights were off and you couldn't see where you were going. 3. Big Thunder Railroad. I know it is only traveling at about 35mph, but it is just fast enough to ruffle your hair while allowing you to take in all the scenery and details of Disney on the ride. 4. Peter Pan's Flight. It is short and cutesy, but it's always been one of my favorites. I just like to pretend I really am flying. 5. Kilimanjaro Safaris. I love being able to look at wild animals acting naturally and not being in cages. I remember one time a giraffe was chasing a zebra in circles. Our tour guide let us stop and watch for several minutes. It was so amusing to see them interacting as they might in the wild. 6. Spaceship Earth (aka - the golf ball). I love that you actually learn in this ride, but the Disney team also added in a few funny things within the scenes. It is also neat thinking you are traveling up a huge sphere and back down again. 7. Carousel of Progress. I love seeing the family progress with the progression of time. You leave wondering how things will be in another 25 years. Plus, I honestly love the song "It's a great big beautiful tomorrow, shining on the edge of every day" - or something similar. But the tune is catchy without being annoying (i.e. It's a small world). 8. Tower of Terror. It's controlled so it's really not terrorizing...but it's still fun and an adrenaline rush. And because it is controlled...you never know how many times they will drop you, could be 2, could be 4...but it's always fun. Make sure you make a funny face at the second opening of the doors to outside...they take your picture. I've got some great expressions that have been caught if I do say so myself...always the ham! 9. Aerosmith's Rockin Rollercoaster. Hey, I am an adrenaline junkie after all. And this little doozie flips you upside down numerous times and takes off at top speed. No slow climb up a hill, you start out fast and with the sounds of Aerosmith in your ears. What a great time for us 1980's kids! 10. Haunted Mansion. I didn't open my eyes on this ride until I was 10. I'm such a scaredy cat...still can't watch horror movies either! But now I just appreciate all the effort and effects. Plus the great mixture of scary and silly to keep it PG for the kids. 11. Journey into the Imagination. Now I do have an issue with this ride though. I LOVED the original ride better with the Dreamfinder andFigment. It was just cute and silly and I loved the song...One Little Spark. The new ride is fine and much more interactive...but the old one is the one from my childhood...so it will always hold a special place in my heart. 12. Pirates of the Caribbean. This has always been another one of those rides you just have to go on. I wish they had not had to all PC with the songs and the scenes of the men chasing the pretty girls...but what can you do. I still love it! Yo Ho...a pirate's life for me! 13. Splash Mountain. What Southern isn't familiar with the "Song of the South" story and Zip-a-dee-doo-dah? And what person wouldn't want to visit their own "laughing place" as often as possible? Not too much the refreshing "dip" at the end on a hot Orlando afternoon!

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Happy Songs

Do you have a song that every time you hear it you just smile...or even get up and start shaking your "bon-bon"? On rainy mornings like this morning...I need a little pick me up usually. Do you know my surprising choice of song? Johnny Nash's "Bright, Sunshiny Day"! Oh, you know the one..."I can see clearly now the rain has gone. I can see all obstacles in my way. Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind. It's going to be a bright, bright sunshiny day" I can still see his music video and that cheerful...albeit tacky yellow outfit he wore strolling down the road. Yes, I was born in the 70's and I'm showing my age!

A few other go to songs are "Walking on Sunshine" - "I'm walking on sunshine, woooah and don't it feel good!!" and U2's "Beautiful Day" - "It's a beautiful day. Don't let it get away. It's a beautiful day." This song came out the year Ian and I got married and we had our wedding montage set up to it on video. So naturally, it brings back warm fuzzies from our wedding. Another song I can't help but smile over is a song from church that came back to me suddenly when Matthew was given a poor diagnosis. It's called "Eagle's Wings" - "And He will raise you up on eagle's wings, Bear you on the breath of dawn, Make you to shine like the sun, And hold you in the palm of His Hand." I sang this song with tears streaming down my face in the shower the night before learning from our specialists if they were going to say the only thing to do was terminate or if they would be willing to help my strong little fighter. Happy to say, they have been able to help...though Matthew doesn't like to cooperate! Typical of a man I guess! ;)

As I was thinking these songs over in my mind, it occured to me (I take awhile sometimes) that they all have to do with beautiful days and sunshine in particular. I feed off the sun; I was nicknamed sunbunny by my parents when I was little. I guess that's why during stormy, gloomy weather (both literally and emotionally) I turn to the sun in song if I can't do so any other way.

Here's hoping you and your's have a bright, sunshiny day...even if it is raining now!

Happy Earth Day world!

I love Earth Day. I really miss being a teacher on this day, more than any other day (including Teacher Appreciation day!) In April we always started on our ecology units in biology class so an Earth day unit just fit in naturally with our state curriculum to cover natural resource cycles. I would always have my kids in all classes (physics - biology) build a dream house that included plans of efficiency. You would be surprised how detailed a 14 year old would be and how much excitement they showed for their house! And with the added knowledge that saving money on your utility bills means you can blow it "toys"...that really got them involved.

Now don't get me wrong...I'm not the tree hugging hippie that for every newspaper I buy, I plant a tree. I leave the tv on when I'm not in the room and I own a gas guzzling SUV. But I still appreciate the beauty found in nature and want to preserve it for my grandchildren to enjoy.

I have been gone (so to speak) from my "home" here in Georgia for nearly years with my husband's stint in the coast guard. Now that I am home and able to see more of the area than just the roads leading between my parents and my in-laws...I can take in all the changes. They have torn down my favorite teenage walking trails that were behind my high school to put up a strip mall with an Italian restaurant, Kinkos, Hallmark and a Starbucks. Even though I'm all about food...I'd much rather enjoy the trails that bring back so many good memories. They have widen many roads in the area taking away the front yards of most homeowners and even a few houses completely. It honestly saddens me to not recognize my surroundings in such familiar places.

So in honor of our environment, I have decided to post a recipe I make with my school kids as we enjoy learning outside for the day. It requires no baking and I get rave reviews from the kids with smiles and messy hands. We just do this in our science room on top of heat plate (which uses less energy than a stove top to boil milk). It's quick and easy. Here it is. Enjoy!

2 cups sugar
2 tablespoons cocoa
1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup butter
1/2 cup peanut butter
2 cups oatmeal
1 teaspoon vanilla flavoring

Mix cocoa and sugar in a bowl and mix in milk. Bring mixture up to a slow boil adding in butter. Let the mixture boil for two minutes, stirring constantly so the sugar and milk don't over burn/carmelize! Take off heat and mix in the remaining ingredients. Take the mixture in spoonfuls and allow to cool on wax paper. We called these mudpie cookies. YUM!