Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Choosing the hard way

I chose the hard way. How much simpler life would be if I never had to worry about PD, hemo, surgeries, medicines and the like. We would have traveled, explored and spent more time together as a family. But something would have been missing. If I had agreed to terminate my pregnancy...if I had a do not resuscitate order in the NICU...if we didn't have someone step forward to donate her kidney - life would be different.
We chose the hard way, the parents of our renal warriors. Seeing our child in pain, waiting out numerous surgeries and procedures, staying vigilant by his hospital bedside and praying. We have fought for our child's right to take his first breath. The hard way comes with unbelievable pain, anxiety and fear.
The hard way also is lined with hope, love and trust, but sometimes it is hard to see.
When your spouse dies, you are referred to as a widow/widower. When both sets of parents die, a child is called an orphan. There is no name for parents when their child dies - there are no words that can describe it. A friend of mine has lost her son to a long battle of end stage kidney disease. I have no words.
She chose the hard way and has now falling on harder times. But in between she had many beautiful moments. Moments she will cherish her whole lifetime until she can be with him again. And when she is, he will be whole and perfect for the first time.
Sweet Aidan flies into heaven lifted by his mother's love and holding on to his father's kidney. Their love will grow for their son as he now becomes their protector, watching over them.
His way of saying thank you for believing in me, for fighting for me and for loving me SO much to let me go home.
Please take a moment and say a special prayer for this grieving family: pray that the hole in their hearts mend. Give them the strength to carry on these next few days and for the many years following. Bless them with the comfort of knowing they did ALL they could do and to NEVER doubt that. Help them to see happier times and to hold onto Aidan's love.

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